Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Parent Questions "Racy" Photos

John Rosemond is a popular psychologist, syndicated columnist, and parenting expert. I don't know much about him and his beliefs, but I recently found an interesting column by him in the Charlotte Observer. A concerned mother writes to John that she's found "racy photos" of women on her teenage son's cell phone. Her husband wants to ignore it, and she wants to talk about it. John sides with the mother, and answers:
The door is open for your husband to sit down with his son and give him some fundamental instruction concerning the opposite sex: call it Women 101.

He could begin this mentoring by helping your son begin to understand that thinking of women as mere sexual objects is a form of disrespect; that anatomical attributes are not the measure of a woman; that while good looks are not a bad thing, the real prize is a woman who is a wonderful wife and mother, a woman, in other words, whose beauty goes deeper than her skin. There’s an opening here for your husband to help his son begin the journey to valid manhood. He should seize it!

Read more here: http://www.charlotteobserver.com/2012/04/02/3145166/john-rosemond-racy-photos-mean.html#storylink=misearch#storylink=cpy
I found this response very wise, and it sounded as if it was written from a woman's point of view!

I remember when the Internet was relatively new, and how disturbed I was when the men at work congregated together at a computer to ogle over pornographic images. It was my first realization that with all the positive changes that the Internet was bringing, there were also going to be some big problems.

In the digital world today, pornography and "racy photos" are certainly continuing to degrade society's belief that women are sexual objects with little other value. In my talks with two experienced elementary school teachers, they have seen boys as young as fourth grade know how to navigate the web to get pornographic images - using school computers. I'm of the belief that this exposure, and the continuation of this practice, will be very harmful to boys and their future relationships with women, to say nothing of how it is hurting our broader culture.

On the PsychCentral blog, Robert Weiss, an expert in sexual dysfunctions, writes:
It appears that the tsunami of accessible, affordable, and increasingly graphic Internet pornography accessed via home computers, laptops, smart-phones and other mobile devices we now carry in our pockets can, for some, cause not only emotional, relationship, and financial problems, but also sexual dysfunction. In a way, this confirms what many in the sexual addiction treatment field have known for quite some time—that among the many symptoms and consequences of sex and porn addiction is reduced or even nonexistent interest in sexual, physical, and emotional connections with spouses and/or longer-term sexual partners. 
All kinds of relationships, including marriages and families, can be harmed by Internet porn. Unfortunately, protecting kids from the effects of porn may be a very hard-fought battle. It may be easier for some parents to ignore the issue. But because of the real and potential psychological risks, parents need to be vigilant, be aware that it's easy for kids to find graphic sexual images, and take every opportunity to communicate personal values when issues like this come up at home.

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